Thought of my obituary today........

What the hell am I thinking?...I think it's just being exhausted from it all...I thought of my obituary and what it should say. This is not the thinking God wants....I wanted it to say how I love my girlfriends, my son, my husband, my family, my career...I think I am tired and worried at my weightloss..(105 pounds now) I went in for my last shot for my WBC for the week, but they will pick up again next week...but I am looking at chemo#11 on Monday and in a weird way I am looking forward to it,  it's because it is bringing me closer to being done! Done! Done! Done! This has been one helluva journey. Cancer you are a mean SOB, I don't like you, and I don't like what you have done to to others, it breaks my heart when I see patients in the clinic with me, I just can't forget what I see every week.......I learn from them though because they share their stories and their hope. Definitely they are lessons that I will cherish for the rest of my life. My voice overs keep my mind off of this crazy thinking...it's in the drive there to that cancer clinic that I think these crazy thoughts!......but I know I need to thank God for my life today...thank you God for my life.