So the new year is here...welcome 2012

I read over last years entry at this time. New Years Eve to be exact....I was in the throes of my chemotherapy. I was hating cancer. I still do. A colleague of mine just shared his story of his last days with his father who had melanoma-how he was frantic for not remembering where his car was parked while on an outing with his dying dad, and his dad was shuffeling along and stopping and smelling the roses. And he was consumed with emotions....probably mostly fear. I lived all of that. I witnessed the fear our 16 year old son had watching me writher away losing weight every day. I saw the fear on his face and sadly understood-yet I was the cancer patient-and there I was trying to enjoy each moment just like my friends Dad was doing. I remember my husband driving in the car with me after I came home from an infusion ranting about politics and spewing out awful stuff and I said aloud finally after tolerating it all in the ride home: "Can you just stop!! Can you just imagine what my world is like now? This crap is not important' He was silenced. Everybody is affected by cancer. The patient, the loved ones, the friends, the colleagues. It is just utterly insane.But today is the beginning of the new year..I don't have to go there anymore. I can set my sights foreward. Today I voiced 6 reads from my home studio. Every single time I wrapped up the read with all the editing and gave the title to the piece to send to the producer I was filled with satisfying joy. Then I got in my car and recorded in a local studio and thought the same. I am satsified. I have been forever changed by my journey. How can I complain? I am ungrateful if I do..Thank you God for my life today.